Vampires Suck (2010)
Directed by Aaron Seltzer
Becca, an anxious, non-vampire teen is torn between two boys. Before she can choose, Becca must get around her controlling father, who treats her like a child. Meanwhile, Becca's friends contend with their own romantic issues – all of which collide at the prom.
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18 films that influenced Vampires Suck
What critics say influenced Vampires Suck
Other than scant allusions to "Blacula" and "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," "Vampires Suck" stays pretty close to a true parody: it lambastes a single work of art--in this case, the "Twilight" series by Stephanie Meyer.
A laugh-free Twilight parody.
In “Vampires Suck,” the “Twilight” spoof by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the Bella character points out the Cullen family and asks a classmate about them.
HANDOUT Vampires Suck, the latest satire from writer/directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, lampoons the Twilight movies.
No name newcomer Jenn Proske has K Stew down pat -- from her fluttering downcast eyes to her crooked little lip-biting trick, even the mannered way Miss "Twilight" fiddles with her hair.
What makes “Vampires Suck” work to a degree (making it the best film that Friedberg and Seltzer have done) is that it focuses on the “Twilight” vampire craze.
To my mind, the funniest one is the knockabout Love at First Bite, starring George Hamilton as Count Dracula in New York.
And they're miles and miles away from the masterpieces of all film parodies, Mel Brooks's Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein , in which serious moments are undercut by a gag that comes out of the situation entirely organically and naturally, rather than being dropped on top of the situation arbitrarily (and of course it's no coincidence that, even through the parody, you can tell that Brooks really loves Westerns and Universal horror).
Imagine if every few seconds, someone in Blazing Saddles took a moment to tell another character that there were making fun of Westerns.
Mel Brooks ' " Young Frankenstein " paid tribute to classic horror films.
And they're miles and miles away from the masterpieces of all film parodies, Mel Brooks's Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein , in which serious moments are undercut by a gag that comes out of the situation entirely organically and naturally, rather than being dropped on top of the situation arbitrarily (and of course it's no coincidence that, even through the parody, you can tell that Brooks really loves Westerns and Universal horror).
Given the two-year gap since their last movie, one might have expected Friedberg/Seltzer might have made more of an effort and come up with some quality gags in the vein of their comedic forefathers the Zucker brothers (Airplane, The Naked Gun).
Would-be comedy flies fast, but it all feels recycled and stupidnot so stupid it's funny, mind you, like in "Airplane!" and "The Naked Gun," which actually had brains behind their ridiculousness, but so stupid it's just plain stupid.
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…and Top Secret! to the putrid and barely tolerable Wayans brothers' I'm Gonna Git You Sucka and the first two Scary Movies (which Friedberg and Seltzer co-wrote along with four other writers) to Friedberg and Seltzer's Epic Movie and Vampires Suck, films whose instantly forgettable titles signal a knowing level of unimportance.
Having lampooned the horror genre (Scary Movie), rom-coms (Date Movie) and even the film 300 (Meet the Spartans), the directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer turn their attentions to the Twilight saga with Vampires Suck.
They wrote the original Scary Movie (2000) and directed Date Movie (2006), Epic Movie (2007), Meet the Spartans (2008) and Disaster Movie (also 2008).
They also pasted together the wildly scattershot scripts for “Spy Hard” and “Scary Movie.”
Well, maybe it’s not fair to say I can’t stand spoof flicks now, more like I can’t stand spoof flicks associated with writer-directors Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg, save perhaps “Spy Hard” and the first “Scary Movie” (which I found hilarious on first viewing and now can’t seem to get into on subsequent viewings).
Vampires Suck exists in a mirthless void somewhere between the satiric lunacy of the genre standard-bearer, the Abraham/Zucker classic Flying High (1980), and the frustratingly uneven Scary Movie series, possessing none of the former's superb timing nor the latter's machine-gun delivery of hit/miss gags.
…and Top Secret! to the putrid and barely tolerable Wayans brothers' I'm Gonna Git You Sucka and the first two Scary Movies (which Friedberg and Seltzer co-wrote along with four other writers) to Friedberg and Seltzer's Epic Movie and Vampires Suck, films whose instantly forgettable titles signal a knowing level of unimportance.
It was only a matter of time until Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the writing-directing duo responsible for a parade of genre film parodies from “Date Movie’’ to “Meet the Spartans,’’ turned their attention to the “Twilight’’ franchise.
That's because writers Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer worked with the Wayans before striking out on their own to write screenplays for "Date Movie" (which received a 6 percent rotten rating from Rotten Tomatoes); "Epic Movie" (2 percent rotten rating); "Meet the Spartans" (another 2 percent rotten rating); and "Disaster Movie" (you guessed it--another 2 percent rotten rating).
After a slew of really bad parody movies (including “Date Movie,” “Epic Movie” and “Disaster Movie”), writer-directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer step up their game by picking a target that really deserves it: The “Twilight” franchise.
After a 30-month span in which they released "Date Movie," "Epic Movie," "Meet the Spartans," and "Disaster Movie" , they were silent.
After their cancerous 2008 effort, “Disaster Movie,” I honestly thought that would be the end of filmmakers Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg, two poisonously unfunny fellows who personally suffocated the parody genre with lethal features such as “Epic Movie,” “Date Movie,” and “Meet the Spartans.”
The duo, responsible for such stinkers as "Date Movie," "Epic Movie" and "Disaster Movie," now have turned their puny sights on the rabid pop culture phenomenon of sexy vampires.
That's because writers Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer worked with the Wayans before striking out on their own to write screenplays for "Date Movie" (which received a 6 percent rotten rating from Rotten Tomatoes); "Epic Movie" (2 percent rotten rating); "Meet the Spartans" (another 2 percent rotten rating); and "Disaster Movie" (you guessed it--another 2 percent rotten rating).
Though ever-so slightly better than the abysmal past efforts from the Seltzer/Friedberg stable (Date Movie, 2006; Epic Movie, 2007; Meet The Spartans, 2008; Disaster Movie, 2008), the greatest achievement of Vampires Suck is an entirely unintentional one – in condensing the key story elements of the three Twilight films into less than 90 minutes, it pinpoints what bloated melodramas Meyers' films really are.
After a 30-month span in which they released “Date Movie,” “Epic Movie,” “Meet the Spartans,” and “Disaster Movie” , they were silent.
Writer/directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the brain trust behind such spoofs as Date Movie, Epic Movie and Disaster Movie have come up with another drearily pointless parody, this time lampooning the Twilight series of movies (actually just the first two, Twilight and New Moon).
The writer-director team of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer is noteworthy in that three of their first four pictures — Epic Movie, Meet the Spartans and Disaster Movie — have all managed to place on that list (only Date Movie missed the cut).
Their particular brand of generic, plain-wrap satire, seen in such films as Date Movie , Epic Movie , and Disaster Movie (I’m still waiting for them to parody themselves with Movie Movie, but that might be a bit too meta), still holds a firm foothold over the shrinking yet nonetheless significant segment of the movie-watching audience that lacks broadband access to the internet, where better parodies can be found in abundance on such sites as funnyordie.com…
What more skilled performers like Ken Jeong (2009's " The Hangover "), Arielle Kebbel (2009's " The Uninvited "), and Diedrich Bader (2007's " Balls of Fury ") are doing here, however, is anybody's guess.
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The plot, for lack of a better word, is based on a pastiche of moments from the first two "Twilight" films, "Twilight" and "The Twilight Saga: New Moon."
Instead, they merely plop down some sequence practically lifted wholesale from Twilight or The Twilight Saga: New Moon, add a gross-out gag, a piece of knockabout humor or a pop culture reference that will seem hopelessly dated in just a few years, and leave it at that.
That's because writers Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer worked with the Wayans before striking out on their own to write screenplays for "Date Movie" (which received a 6 percent rotten rating from Rotten Tomatoes); "Epic Movie" (2 percent rotten rating); "Meet the Spartans" (another 2 percent rotten rating); and "Disaster Movie" (you guessed it--another 2 percent rotten rating).
After a slew of really bad parody movies (including “Date Movie,” “Epic Movie” and “Disaster Movie”), writer-directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer step up their game by picking a target that really deserves it: The “Twilight” franchise.
After a 30-month span in which they released "Date Movie," "Epic Movie," "Meet the Spartans," and "Disaster Movie" , they were silent.
After their cancerous 2008 effort, “Disaster Movie,” I honestly thought that would be the end of filmmakers Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg, two poisonously unfunny fellows who personally suffocated the parody genre with lethal features such as “Epic Movie,” “Date Movie,” and “Meet the Spartans.”
The duo, responsible for such stinkers as "Date Movie," "Epic Movie" and "Disaster Movie," now have turned their puny sights on the rabid pop culture phenomenon of sexy vampires.
They wrote the original Scary Movie (2000) and directed Date Movie (2006), Epic Movie (2007), Meet the Spartans (2008) and Disaster Movie (also 2008).
That's because writers Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer worked with the Wayans before striking out on their own to write screenplays for "Date Movie" (which received a 6 percent rotten rating from Rotten Tomatoes); "Epic Movie" (2 percent rotten rating); "Meet the Spartans" (another 2 percent rotten rating); and "Disaster Movie" (you guessed it--another 2 percent rotten rating).
After a slew of really bad parody movies (including “Date Movie,” “Epic Movie” and “Disaster Movie”), writer-directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer step up their game by picking a target that really deserves it: The “Twilight” franchise.
After a 30-month span in which they released "Date Movie," "Epic Movie," "Meet the Spartans," and "Disaster Movie" , they were silent.
After their cancerous 2008 effort, “Disaster Movie,” I honestly thought that would be the end of filmmakers Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg, two poisonously unfunny fellows who personally suffocated the parody genre with lethal features such as “Epic Movie,” “Date Movie,” and “Meet the Spartans.”
The duo, responsible for such stinkers as "Date Movie," "Epic Movie" and "Disaster Movie," now have turned their puny sights on the rabid pop culture phenomenon of sexy vampires.
They wrote the original Scary Movie (2000) and directed Date Movie (2006), Epic Movie (2007), Meet the Spartans (2008) and Disaster Movie (also 2008).
It was only a matter of time until Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the writing-directing duo responsible for a parade of genre film parodies from “Date Movie’’ to “Meet the Spartans,’’ turned their attention to the “Twilight’’ franchise.
That's because writers Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer worked with the Wayans before striking out on their own to write screenplays for "Date Movie" (which received a 6 percent rotten rating from Rotten Tomatoes); "Epic Movie" (2 percent rotten rating); "Meet the Spartans" (another 2 percent rotten rating); and "Disaster Movie" (you guessed it--another 2 percent rotten rating).
After their cancerous 2008 effort, “Disaster Movie,” I honestly thought that would be the end of filmmakers Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg, two poisonously unfunny fellows who personally suffocated the parody genre with lethal features such as “Epic Movie,” “Date Movie,” and “Meet the Spartans.”
Having lampooned the horror genre (Scary Movie), rom-coms (Date Movie) and even the film 300 (Meet the Spartans), the directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer turn their attentions to the Twilight saga with Vampires Suck.
They wrote the original Scary Movie (2000) and directed Date Movie (2006), Epic Movie (2007), Meet the Spartans (2008) and Disaster Movie (also 2008).
After a 30-month span in which they released "Date Movie," "Epic Movie," "Meet the Spartans," and "Disaster Movie" , they were silent.